Today, I am living in an “in-between” frame of mind. It is Wednesday morning in Shanghai and it is early Tuesday evening at home in SoCal. My mind is in two places at once and so is my heart.
I had to write this quick before the memory subsides…that is, if it will. I wasn’t even sure that I was going to post this for “all to see” but that is the point of sharing what God has laid on your heart. Let others know so that they can partner with you! Our stories and our experiences are meant to be shared.
I left the hotel after having breakfast with Tony (my man!), to walk down to the local Starbucks. Yeah, I know….but sometimes you just need the smells & tastes from home.
As I stood outside at the corner waiting to cross the street (or should I say, waiting to play tag with the myriad of cars, pedestrians, scooters, and bicyclists) I was struck by this thought….
“How many of these people know the Lord.”
I can tell you that I normally don’t have that question running through my mind unless I’m in a situation that I’ve prepared myself to be in. Does that resonate with anyone else? I think living in America, I just figure that everyone at least knows who God and Jesus are. They may or may not believe in Him as their Savior, but they have heard His name. I mean, I am a “tag along” on Tony’s business trip, not on a purposeful, planned for, missions trip.
The next moment, the Holy Spirit begins to whisper a directive to my heart…a promise of sorts. One that I’m totally unprepared to hear.
“These are my people and I am calling you to love them. I am calling you to be available to serve my people in ways you have only begun to imagine. I am calling you to love my people around this world who are desperately seeking Me but don’t know how to find me.”
I began to feel completely undone in my heart, the tears started to well up in my eyes, and I was both thrilled and terrified to begin to ponder what all this means. So I guess I was terrifrilled?
So, not wanting to scare anyone around me as I walked down the street, I let my heart ask the questions. I was already crying, talking out loud would bring way more attention than I wanted to garner.
“What are You talking about Lord?”
~ I’m telling you to love my people. You have Me so you have the ability to do that.
“How am I supposed to do what you’re asking?”
~ I gave you the gift of writing and conversation, so use that.
“Do you mean I’m literally going to travel the world?”
~ You have a passport & a 10 year travel visa to China, don’t you?
….ps….I love it when the Holy Spirit has a sense of humor in His answers…
“Okay, what do I do now?”
~ Just listen to My voice and you will know My plans for you.
Um….okay….
But being me, I want to know and I want to have it all figured out…now.
I will tell you that even now, sitting at a window table in Starbucks, the tears are once again pouring down my cheeks. My heartbeat quickens as I think again about what I feel God just told me. And once again I think, “But what does that mean??”
The Lord is so good…because as soon as I ask that again, He begins to bring memories to my mind of past conversations.
I’m remembering a conversation I had this past September with a sweet godly woman, Mrs. Jan Yaxley, as I sat with her in a lovely restaurant overlooking a small pond that was mostly covered with water lilies. I met her because I had the privilege to travel with Tony on a business trip to Snells Beach, New Zealand. {seriously…it’s so cute!}
Her husband Trevor, owns a Christian animation company that Tony is connected to via one of their films. On one of our last days in town, she asked to take me to lunch. It was one of those moments where you meet someone for the first time but feel like you’ve known them your whole life.
We talked about our kids, stages of life, and what we saw the Lord doing in our life.
If you know me, you know that I love to write and speak/teach within church ministries to women of all ages. My hearts desire is to be a published author and speak to women all over. Admittedly, when I shared this with her, what I meant by “all over” was to be just around the country…the US…safe places.
She said to me, “Why not the world? What about China?”
{insert sound of tires screeching here}
Wait now…what?!
I just about spit out my coffee! What in the world was she talking about?? What do I want to do that for? I’m a stay at home mom with stuff to do at home. {side note…don’t let anyone make you feel like you are “just” a mom….it’s the hardest job!}
You see, she & her husband have contacts all over the world including China. With their company, they do a lot of business with people in China. That coupled with knowing that Tony travels to China sometimes, she said, “The next time Tony goes to China, you should go with Him. God has a plan and I see you speaking to women all over the world about how much God loves them & wants to pursue them.”
Women from all over the world? Well, living in Southern California, that is definitely possible because of the melting pot of culture we live in. So, okay, sure…women from all over the world. Check!
To be honest, when Tony found out that I could accompany him on this current trip to Shanghai, I didn’t remember that conversation with this lovely woman. I thought… “Yay…free trip to China? Let me go get my travel visa!”
Which brings another memory swirling to my mind.
When I picked up my Visa at a little Chinese travel office in Pasadena, the man & woman that were there were so happy to see me. I was greeted with smiling faces, “We have been waiting for you Miss René.” What? They are just being good business owners. But still…it totally caught me off guard. I got my wallet out of my purse to show them my ID & receipt of purchase, they checked all documents, and handed me my passport back.
It was open to the page where my new 10 year visa had been secured. The gentleman said, “You have many trips ahead of you. Please enjoy my country and my people.”
Um….okay….
Is that something he said to everyone? The woman behind the desk seemed just as enthusiastic in wishing me many good travels ahead.
Back to reality….My heart is once again struck with this memory, more tears are threatening to fall down my face.
Isn’t that basically what the Holy Spirit just whispered to my heart a short bit ago as I decided to take a walk instead of going back to my room to read?
“These are my people and I’m calling you to love them.”
Right before we left for this trip, I took a friend out for a pre-birthday lunch at one of my favorite places in San Marino called Julienne’s. {If you go…buy a loaf of their Rosemary Currant bread…it’s amazing!!}
I was telling her about a funny thing that had come up for the trip. Tony actually has events & meetings set up with three different companies & the schedule was packed! So much so that he was double-booked one of the mornings. Lo and behold, the contact for one of the meetings asked if I would go in Tony’s place. Well sure, happy to help out.
Then a few days later, I found out that I was expected to give a speech…in front of 50 members of the press, and about 150 other attendees. Good thing I’m not afraid of public speaking!! Thank you Jesus!!
I shared this with my friend at our lunch, and jokingly said, “My first speaking gig in China.” Haha!! She finished her bite of meatloaf and said, “Why are you laughing. It could be the first of many. You don’t know what God is going to do.” My friend is one who hears so clearly from the Lord, speaks with conviction, and does so carefully as to only share what she hears the Holy Spirit says to her. When she has prophetically spoken over me, I know it’s something to pay attention to.
I didn’t end up giving my 5 minute speech but that was fine. However, I felt a stirring in my heart during the mtg, but didn’t know why…until I heard God tell me that Tony & I would soon visit this city. Really? Me too? That doesn’t make any sense? Tony is the business guy. What will I be there for?
Nonetheless, I did my job as VP of our Animation company (Tony Bancroft, Inc.), and all was good. Then our contact came over to me & said, “Come over here. Someone wants to ask you a question.” Turns out that “someone” was a local newscaster from the city that was hosting the press conference; and along with my interpreter, we had about a 5-7 minute interview. All I know is, there were far more then 200 people who saw that.
What does God have planned???
I don’t have anymore to go on right now, but I tell you what…I’m gonna be paying extra attention from now on! I never have really had an experience where God’s plan has been perfectly laid out before me to follow.
I’m not nervous about the future. I have lived enough of life’s joys and challenges, that I EXPECT to be surprised by God and how He chooses to work.
I’d be lying if I didn’t admit sometimes I wished that He worked according to my time table; but I’m always more grateful that He doesn’t. My journey of faith has been one of great triumphs and desperately low defeats. But my faith has grown stronger with each step. Strong enough that even when I get freaked out about life, I know beyond a shadow of doubt, that His plans are the best…that His direction for me is the most fruitful.
So now, I wait. And I watch. And I dig deeper into God’s word to receive His direction.
I share this with you to ask you to join me in prayer ~ to see God’s path & to boldly walk through doors of opportunity, to love His people all over the world.
Thank you for reading this & thank you for your prayers!!
Blessings,
Rene’
Broken & Blessed~Adventures in Gratutide! 